A legal challenge to Saskatchewan鈥檚 new law requiring parental consent if children under 16 want to change their names or pronouns at school is back in court this week. New Brunswick enacted a similar measure last year, and other provinces are looking at doing the same.

Lawyers representing UR Pride, an LGBT group in Regina, say the rule discriminates against youth who aren鈥檛 able to come out to their families. The Saskatchewan and New Brunswick governments have said they made the changes after hearing from many parents that they want them.

Saskatchewan used the notwithstanding clause, a rarely used provision that lets governments override Charter rights for five years, to prevent the court challenge from proceeding.

The Canadian Press sent reporters across the country to talk to parents about the issue.

Krystle Wilpert, Calgary

The mother of a four- and seven-year-old said children should have the choice when they are that little.

鈥淓ven with their name, sometimes they shorten their given name,鈥� she said. 鈥淚f they are actually wanting to legally change it, then parents should be advised.

鈥淲hen they are this little, if you want to be known as she, they, he, that鈥檚 part of their identity, I think, and figuring out what they prefer.

鈥淚f you want to legally change it when you鈥檙e of age, that鈥檚 a different story.鈥�

Wilpert, who鈥檚 a teacher, said parents need to have strong relationships with their children.

鈥淚f the parents have a great relationship with the school and with their child, it probably wouldn鈥檛 be an issue.鈥�

She said it would be awkward if Alberta were to bring in a similar policy to Saskatchewan.

鈥淚f you鈥檙e a classroom teacher, having to phone a parent to say, 鈥業s it OK if I call your child they?鈥� It creates awkwardness and it doesn鈥檛 build that relationship that kids need to feel safe and secure when they are growing up.鈥�

Nicolas Brizard, Montreal

The father of girls age three, five, 10 and 12, said he hadn鈥檛 previously thought about whether parents should be notified 鈥� or asked for their consent 鈥� if children want to change their name or pronouns at school.

He said it鈥檚 not something that has been the subject of widespread debate in Quebec.

Brizard said young people start really searching for their identity around the age of 14, but the idea that they could change their name or gender identity without parental permission before the age of 16 鈥渋s a bit difficult.鈥�

Even if parental consent isn鈥檛 required, he said he thinks parents should be notified.

鈥淭hey don鈥檛 always have the necessary tools to make these decisions by themselves,鈥� Brizard said in French.

鈥淪ometimes they鈥檝e had bad experiences, sometimes good experiences, but it鈥檚 a major decision, so you need to have the necessary tools to reflect in order to make this change.鈥�

Angela Campbell, Rothesay, N.B.

Campbell said her child was assigned female at birth, but is now gender fluid and uses the pronoun they.

鈥淥nce puberty hit, they started experiencing anxiety and depression,鈥� said Campbell, whose child turns 20 this week.

鈥淚t took a long time to sort of get to the root of what was going on. It turned out to be gender identity was the root of the problem.鈥�

She said her child found support from teachers and guidance counsellors at school, and is grateful they were there.

School and teachers offer a practice run for the real world in a safe space, and changes made by New Brunswick remove that, she said.

鈥淚t would be wonderful and very utopian of us to think that home is always the safest place for children to be able to go and have these conversations, but that鈥檚 not the reality.鈥�

Jose Henriquez, Vancouver

The father said he would be supportive if one of his two sons wanted to use a different name or pronoun at school, but he would want to know about the change beforehand.

鈥淚t鈥檚 my child. You know, we don鈥檛 own our kids, but we raise them up in the way that we think is right,鈥� said Henriquez, with his eight- and nine-year-old sons chatting together nearby.

鈥淚 think if they want to do something like that, they should come to the mom and dad first.鈥�

That鈥檚 especially true for younger children, Henriquez said.

鈥淲hen they鈥檙e really young like this, I don鈥檛 think they even know what they鈥檙e wanting,鈥� he said.

鈥淚f these guys are older, and he says to me something like that, then I鈥檝e got no choice, he can do what he wants.鈥�

Still, Henriquez said he鈥檇 want to be the first person to have that talk with his child.

鈥淎s a good parent, you support them because they鈥檙e your child and you love them, you know, and you don鈥檛 outcast them.鈥�

Jonathan Rambo, Toronto

The father of three strongly believes parental consent should be required before a student under 16 wishes to change their pronoun or gendered name.

He said children at that age aren鈥檛 developed enough to make those decisions for themselves.

鈥淭hey still haven鈥檛 reached that maturity level to be changing names,鈥� he said

Rambo has a daughter in Grade 10, a son in Grade 8, and a son in Grade 2 鈥� all ages at which they are still very impressionable, he said.

鈥淟ike, my daughter, from my experience, she is still going through a whole bunch of friends,鈥� he said.

鈥淪o if she gets with a group of friends, and they could say, 鈥極h let鈥檚 change our names,鈥� but later on she might outgrow that group of friends. It鈥檚 still not for sure if that鈥檚 what she鈥檚 going to want in the future. She鈥檚 still learning in life.鈥�

Rambo said that even if parents aren鈥檛 required to give consent, they should at least be informed when a child decides to use a different name or pronoun at school.

鈥淚 would like to know if my daughter changes her name. I could be calling her Heather and her name is Mary the next day. I think that鈥檚 a big joke. Let kids be young, let them get used to their name.鈥�

Amanda Stajniak, Glenavon, Sask.

Stajniak lives on a farm about 100 kilometres east of Regina and has children aged 11, nine, eight, four and two.

The mother said parents should be required to give consent if their children want to change their names or pronouns at school.

鈥淚 think parents should totally be involved, as much as possible in everything. I think it鈥檚 a good thing,鈥� she said.

鈥淚f they are having any feelings, I want them to come to me first. They do spend a lot of time with the teachers, but I would hope that they would come to me first.鈥�

Stajniak said in her community, everyone knows each other.

鈥淚t鈥檚 not much of a big deal in smaller towns,鈥� she said.

鈥淓verybody kind of knows everybody鈥檚 stuff. If there鈥檚 any kids that are going through anything, the kids come home and tell us about it.鈥�

The mother said she didn鈥檛 think about pronouns or name changes before Saskatchewan implemented the parental consent requirement.

鈥淚 didn鈥檛 know someone could change their name at school. If my kids were being called something else, I would know, right?鈥�

鈥� By Colette Derworiz in Calgary, Jacob Serebrin in Montreal, Hina Alam in Fredericton, Brenna Owen in Vancouver, Alex Gheciu in Toronto and Jeremy Simes in Regina

The Canadian Press